³ª¸¦ ã¾Æ ³ª¼± Ú¸´ë·ú 5200kmȾ´Ü(14)
by °­¸í±¸ | 20.07.28 12:04
Reconciliation with Myself

 

 

 

 

»ç¸·.jpg




 

Æ®À© ¾Ö·Î Twin Arrow¿¡¼­ À©½½·Î Winslow±îÁö ±æÀº 55kmÀÇ °Å¸®ÀÌ´Ù. ÇÏ·ç Æò±Õ 42km ¸ñÇ¥·Î Çߴµ¥ 55km´Â »ç½Ç ¸Õ ±æÀÌ´Ù. ¹«¸®¸¦ Çؼ­ ÀÌ·¸°Ô ÀÏÁ¤À» ÀâÀº °ÍÀº Áß°£¿¡ ¼÷¹ÚÇÒ °÷ÀÌ ¸¶¶¥Ä¡ ¾Ê°í ½Ä·®µµ º¸ÃæÀ» ÇØ¾ß Çϱ⠶§¹®ÀÌ´Ù.

The road from Twin Arrow to Winslow is 55 kilometers away. The goal was to average 42 kilometers per day, so 55 kilometers is actually a long way. But the reason why I made my schedule so is that there is no right place to stay and replenish the food in the middle.

 

¾î¶³ ¶§¿¡´Â ¸ö°ú ¸¶À½ÀÌ °¡º±°í È°·ÂÀÌ ³ÑÃÄ ¼¼»ó¿¡ ¹«½¼ ÀÏÀÌ¶óµµ ´Ù ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖÀ» °Í °°°í, ¾î¶³ ¶§´Â ³Ê¹« ³ª¾àÇؼ­ ¾Æ¹« Àϵµ ÇÒ ¼ö ¾øÀ» °Í °°±âµµ ÇÏ´Ù. ¿À´ÃÀº ¿À¼º±Þ È£ÅÚ¿¡¼­ °ïÇÑ ÀáÀ» Àß ÀÚ¼­ ±×·±Áö ¸ö¿¡ È°·ÂÀÌ ³ÑÄ£´Ù. °¡º±°Ô ¹ß°ÉÀ½ÀÌ ¿Å°ÜÁø´Ù. °Å±â´Ù ¾à°£ÀÇ ³»¸®¸·±æÀÌ´Ù. ¿À·£¸¸¿¡ ¾îÁ¦¿¡ ÀÌ¾î ±âºÐ ÁÁÀº ¼Óµµ·Î ´Þ·Áº»´Ù. 45km±îÁö Àß ³ª°¡´Ù°¡ Áö³­¹ø¿¡ ÀÌ»óÀÌ ÀÖ¾ú´ø ¹«¸­°üÀýÀÌ ´Ù½Ã Àú·Á¿Â´Ù. °Å±â´Ù ¼Õ¼ö·¹ÀÇ Å¸À̾ ¶Ç ÅÍÁ³´Ù. ´«±æ¿¡¼­ ¹ÙÄû¸¦ »©°í Æ©ºê¸¦ °¥¾Æ ³¢·Á´Ï ¼ÕÀº ½Ã¸®°í ÃßÀ§´Â ¸ô·Á¿À°í ¹è´Â °íÇÁ´Ù. ¿À´ÃÀº 45km°¡ ü·ÂÀÇ ÇÑ°è¿´¾ú³ª º¸´Ù. ¶Ç ´Ù¸¥ ±ä ÇÏ·ç¿´´Ù.

Sometimes my body and mind are light and energetic, so I think I can do anything in the world, and sometimes I seem to be too weak to do anything. Maybe I slept well in a five-star hotel, so my body is full of energy today. The step is lightly moved. And it's a little downhill. I'm running at a pleasant pace subsequently to yesterday in a long while. I ran 45 kilometers very well until my knee joints, of which I had a problem last time, begin to be nimb again. What is worse, the wheelbarrow's tire blew out again. I took the wheel out in the snow and changed the tube, so my hands are too cold and I'm hungry. I guess 45 kilometers was the limit of my physical strength today. It was another long day.

 

¶§·Ð °ßµðÁö ¸ø ÇÒ ¸¸Å­ ¾ÆÇà ¶§°¡ ÀÖ°í ¶§·Ð °ßµô ¸¸Å­ ¾ÆÇà ¶§°¡ ÀÖ´Ù. ±×·¯³ª ´ëºÎºÐÀÇ °ßµðÁö ¸ø ÇÒ ¸¸Å­ ¾ÆÇà ¶§µµ ¿ì¸®°¡ ±×·¸°Ô »ý°¢ÇÏ°í Æ÷±âÇÏ´Â °ÍÀÏ »Ó °ßµðÁö ¸ø ÇÒ °íÅëÀº ¾Æ´Ï´Ù. Àß ³ª°¥ ¶§ ¼Óµµ Á¶ÀýÀ» ÇØ¾ß ÇÏ´Â ÁÙ ¾Ë¸é¼­µµ ´Ã ±×°ÍÀÌ Àß ¾È µÈ´Ù. Àß ³ª°¥ ¶§ ³¡¾øÀÌ Àß ³ª°¥ ÁÙ ¾Ë°í ³»´Ý´Ù°¡ Ç×»ó ÀÏÀ» ±×¸£Ä¡°í ¸¸´Ù. ¾Æ¸¶ ³ª´Â ´ÙÀ½¿¡µµ ¶Ç ÀÌ·± ½Ç¼ö¸¦ ¹Ýº¹Çϸ鼭 »ì¾Æ°¡°í ÀÖÀ» °ÍÀÌ´Ù. °íÄ¡·Á°í ³ë·ÂÀº ÇÏ°ÚÁö¸¸ ¸»ÀÌ´Ù. ´Ù¸®¿¡ °íÅëÀÌ ¿ÀÀÚ ¼Óµµ¸¦ È® ÁÙÀÌ°í õõÈ÷ ´Þ¸°´Ù.

Sometimes it hurts too much to endure and sometimes it hurts to the extent to endure. But even when the pains are unbearable, we only think so and give up, but most of them are not unbearable pains really. I know I have to adjust my speed when I'm going well, but I don't do it all the time. When I am on the right track, I always make a mistake because I run in a full speed thinking everything is going well to the end. Maybe I'll be living by making these mistakes again and again next time, though I'll try to fix it. I slow down a lot and run slowly when my legs hurt.

 

°íÅë°ú ºÒÆíÇÔÀ» ¹þ »ï¾Æ ´Þ¸®´Â ÀÌ ½Ã°£ÀÌ ½ÈÁö ¾ÊÀº °ÍÀº ¸¶À½ÀÌ ÀÌ·¸°Ô Æí¾ÈÇÒ ¼ö°¡ ¾ø±â ¶§¹®ÀÌ´Ù. ¸¶¶óÅæÀº Á¦ÃÊÁ¦ °°Àº ¿ªÇÒÀ» ÇÑ´Ù. ³¡¾øÀÌ ¹Ð·Á¿À´Â °íÅëÀ» À̰ܳ»°í ³ª¸é ¿ì¸®ÀÇ ¸¶À½¼Ó¿¡ ÀâÃÊ¿Í °°Àº °¨Á¤ÀÎ ¹Ì¿ò°ú ¿ì¿ïÁõ ºÐ³ë Æø·Â »ó½Ç°¨ °°Àº °ÍÀ» Á¦°ÅÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Ù. ¿À·¡ ´Þ¸®¸é ¸¶À½Àº °í¿äÇÑ ´Þºûó·³ ÀÜÀÜÇØÁø´Ù. À̶§ Á¤½ÅÀ» ÁýÁßÇؼ­ Å« È£ÈíÀ» ÅëÇÏ¿© ±â¸¦ ¸ðÀ¸¸é ¸ö ¾ÈÀÇ Á¤±â´Â Ã游ÇØÁö°í ³» ¸ö ¾ÈÀÇ ±â¿î°ú ´ëÀÚ¿¬ÀÇ ±â¿î°ú ¼ÒÅëÀ» ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀ» ´À³¤´Ù.

I don't dislike this time of running with such pains and discomforts because I feel it most comfortable in my mind. Marathon acts as a herbicide. After overcoming the endless influx of pains, I can get rid of feelings such as hatred, depression, anger, and violence, which are like weeds in our minds. Long runs make the mind calm like the still moonlight. When I concentrate my mind and gather my energy through a big breath, I feel that my body is full of energy and I am communicating with Mother Nature .

 

Å« È£ÈíÀº ¸í»ó¿¡ µµ¿òÀ» ÁØ´Ù. ¸¶¶óÅæÀ» Çϸ鼭 Å« È£ÈíÀ» ÇÏ´Â µ¿¾È ¸í»óÇϱ⿡ ÁÁ´Ù. ¸í»óÀº ÂüÀھƸ¦ ã¾Æ°¡´Â °ÍÀÌ°í »ó½ÇµÇ¾ú´ø ³ª, ¼û¾îÀÖ¾ú´ø ³ª, ÀáÀçÇØ ÀÖ´Â ³ª¸¦ ã¾Æ °¡´Â ¿©ÇàÀÌ´Ù. ÂüÀھƸ¦ ã¾Æ³»¸é ÀáÀçÇØ ÀÖ´Â ´É·ÂÀ» ¹ß°ßÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Ù. ÃÊ´É·ÂÀ» ¹ßÈÖÇÏ´Â °ÍÇÏ°í´Â Â÷¿øÀÌ Æ²¸®´Ù. ´Þ¸®¸é Æò¼Ò¿Í´Â »ç¹µ ´Ù¸¥ È£Èí, ±× »ý¸íÀÇ ¸®µëÀ» Ÿ°í ÃÊÀÚ¾ÆÀÇ ¼¼°è·Î ¿©ÇàÀ» Çϸ鼭 ¿ìÁÖ¿Í Çϳª°¡ µÈ´Ù.

Great breathing helps in meditation. It's good to meditate if we're breathing heavily while running a marathon. Meditation is a journey to find a real ego, a lost self, a hidden one, a latent one. When we find a real ego, we can find a latent ability. It's totally different from using one's superpowers. Running makes it one with the universe as we travel through the world of super-egos with breath that is quite different from usual, and the rhythm of life.

 

Áß°£¿¡ Àá±ñ ½¬¸é¼­ ÇÚµåÆùÀ» ¿­¾îº¸´Ï ÁöÀο¡°Ô¼­ ¸Þ½ÃÁö°¡ ¿Ô´Ù. ¡®ÀڽŰúÀÇ °áÅõ¿¡¼­ Èû³»½Ã°í ²À ½Â¸®Çϼ¼¿ä!¡¯¶ó´Â ³»¿ëÀ̾ú´Ù. ÀÌ·¸°Ô Èûµé°í ÇÇ°ïÇÒ ¶§ °Ý·Á¿Í À§·ÎÀÇ ¸Þ½ÃÁö´Â Å« ÈûÀÌ µÈ´Ù. ±ØÇÑÀÇ »óȲ¿¡ ³õ¿©ÀÖÀ» ¶§ ´©±º°¡ ³ª¿Í ÇÔ²²ÇÏ°í ÀÖ´Ù´Â ¹ÏÀ½Àº ³ª¸¦ ÁöÅÊÇÏ´Â µçµçÇÑ ÁöÆÎÀÌ°¡ µÈ´Ù. ±×·¯³ª ³ª´Â ³» ÀڽŰú ½Î¿ì°Å³ª °áÅõ¸¦ ¹úÀ̱â À§Çؼ­ ±æÀ» ¶°³­ °ÍÀÌ ¾Æ´Ï¶ó ÀڽŰú È­ÇØÇÏ°í ¹Ý¼ºÇϱâ À§ÇÑ ³ª¸¸ÀÇ ¿À·ÔÇÑ ½Ã°£À» °¡Áö±â À§Çؼ­ ±æÀ» ³ª¼¹´Ù. ½º½º·Î¿¡°Ô È­°¡ ³ª°í ¾î¶³ ¶§´Â ºÐ³ë°¡ ´À²¸Áú ¶§µµ ÀÖ¾ú°í ¾ï¿ïÇÒ ¶§µµ ÀÖ¾úÁö¸¸ ±×·¸´Ù°í ÀڽŰúÀÇ ½Î¿òÀ̳ª °áÅõ¸¦ Çؼ­ ±Øº¹ÇÒ ÀÏÀº ¾Æ´Ï´Ù. ¹«¾ùº¸´Ùµµ Á¦ÀÏ »ç¶û½º·¯¿î Á¸Àç´Â ÀÚ½ÅÀ̱⠶§¹®ÀÌ´Ù. ½Î¿òÀ̳ª °áÅõ´Â µÑ ÁßÀÇ Çϳª ¹«¸­À» ²Ý¾î¾ßÇϴ ó¿¬ÇÔÀÌ ÀÖ´Ù. ±×·¯³ª È­Çظ¦ ÇÏ¸é ¸ðµÎ ´Ù ÆòÈ­¿Í Æò¾ÈÀ» ´©¸°´Ù. ¿ä¶÷¿¡¼­ ¹«´ý±îÁö °¡´Â ±æ¿¡ ³¡¾øÀÌ ºñ±³ÇÏ°í °æÀïÇÏ°í »ì´Ù°¡ ÀÌÁ¦´Â ´Ù ³»·Á³õ°í ºñ¿ì°í ÀÚ½ÅÀÌ ¹«¾ó ´À³¢´ÂÁö, ¹«¾ó ÁÁ¾ÆÇÏ´ÂÁö ã¾Æ ³ª¼­´Â ±æÀÌ´Ù. ÀڽŰúÀÇ È­Çظ¦ ÅëÇؼ­ ÁøÁ¤ÇÑ ¸¶À½ÀÇ ÆòÈ­¿Í Æò¾ÈÀ» ±¸ÇÏ´Â ±æÀÌ´Ù.

I took a break and opened my cell phone, and I got a message from an acquaintance. It said, "Be strong in your fight against yourself and win!" When I'm so tired and fatigued, the message of encouragement and consolation is a great help. The belief that someone is with me when I'm in an extreme situation makes me a strong cane to support me. But I did not go out of my way to fight a duel with myself, but to have my own time in order to reconcile with and reflect on myself. Sometimes I feel angry at myself and sometimes I feel bad and unfair, but that doesn't mean I have to overcome it by fight with myself. Because first of all, the most lovely being is myself. In a fight or duel there is a grimness that one of the two has to kneel down. However, when we reconcile, all will enjoy peace and content. This is the way to empty out now and find out what we feel and what we like after we¡¯ve compared, competed endlessly on the way from the cradle to the grave. Through reconciliation with myself, it is a way to seek peace and calmness of mind.

 

»çÅõ ³¡¿¡ ¸¶Ä§³» À©½½·Î¿¡ µµÂøÇÏÀÚ¸¶ÀÚ ÁüÀ» Ç®°í ¸¶ÄÏÀÌ ¾îµð¿¡ ÀÖ³Ä°í ¹°À¸´Ï ÇÑ 3km¸¦ °¡¸é ¿ù¸¶Æ®°¡ ÀÖ´Ù°í ÇÑ´Ù. ¿À´Ã Àå°Å¸®¸¦ ÇÏ¿´Áö¸¸ ¶Ç ¸î ÀÏÄ¡ ½Ä·®À» ÁغñÇÏÁö ¾ÊÀ¸¸é ¾È µÈ´Ù. ÀÚ²Ù ¼Õ¼ö·¹ÀÇ ¹ÙÄû°¡ ÅÍÁö´Â °ÍÀÌ ¼º°¡½Ã·´±âµµ ÇßÁö¸¸ ¿©ºÐÀÇ Æ©ºê°¡ ´Ù ¶³¾îÁö¸é ºñ»ó»óȲÀÌ ¹ú¾îÁö°í ¸¸´Ù´Â °ÆÁ¤ÀÌ Å»êÀÌ´Ù. ¹«¾ð°¡ ÇØ°á¹æ¹ýÀ» ã¾Æ¾ß ÇÑ´Ù´Â »ý°¢Àº ´Ã ÇØ¿ÔÁö¸¸ »ý°¢»ÓÀ̾ú´Ù. ±×·¡µµ Ȥ½Ã³ª Çؼ­ ½ºÆ÷Ã÷¿ëÇ°ºÎ¿¡¼­ ÀÚÀü°Å ¿ëÇ°ÀÌ ÀÖ´Â °÷À¸·Î °¡¼­ µÑ·¯º¸¾Ò´õ´Ï ¾ÆÁÖ µÎ²¨¿î Æ©ºê°¡ ÀÖ¾ú´Ù. À̰͸¸À¸·Îµµ ¸¹Àº µµ¿òÀÌ µÉ °Í °°¾Ò´Ù. Æ©ºê°¡ ÅÍÁö´Â °ÍÀÌ Å« ¸øÀ̳ª Å« ö»ç°¡ ¾Æ´Ï¶ó ÀÛÀº °¡½Ã³ª °¡´À´Ù¶õ ö»ç ¶§¹®ÀÌ´Ù. °Å±â¿¡ Æ©ºê¸¦ º¸È£Çϴ ŸÀ̾î¿Í Æ©ºê »çÀÌ¿¡ ³Ö´Â µÎ²¨¿î Å×ÀÌÇÁ °°Àº °Í±îÁö ¹ß°ßÇßÀ¸´Ï ³ª´Â ¾ó¸¶³ª ¶Û µíÀÌ ±â»¼´ÂÁö ¸ð¸¥´Ù. ±×µ¿¾È »ç½Ç ³» ¹ßº¸´Ù ¿ì¸® ´ç³ª±Í ¹ßÀÌ ´õ ¼ÓÀ» ½â¿©¼­ °ÆÁ¤ÀÌ À̸¸Àú¸¸ÀÌ ¾Æ´Ï¾ú´Ù. ÀÌÁ¦ ´çºÐ°£ ´ç³ª±Í ¹ß °ÆÁ¤Àº ÇÏÁö ¾Ê¾Æµµ µÇ°Ú´Ù.

When I finally arrived at Winslow after a struggle, I unpacked my luggage and asked where the market was, "If you go about 3 kilometers, there's Wal-Mart.", he answered. I ran a long distance today and so I have to buy some food for a few days ahead. It was annoying that the wheels of the cart were frequently popping off, so I worry a lot that when the extra tubes run out, I will be in an emergency situation. I've always thought about finding a solution, but it's all I've been thinking about. But just in case, I went to the sports department and looked around where the bicycle supplies were, and I found luckily there was a very thick tube. Even this alone seemed to help a lot. The tube burst not because of a large nail or a large wire, but because of a small thorn or thin wire. I don't know how happy I was when I found a thick tape that protects tubes between a tire and a tube. I've been worried more about my donkey's feet than my feet. Now, I don't have to worry about the donkey's feet for a while.

 

´ÙÀ½ ¸ñÀûÁö Ȧºê·è Holbrook±îÁö´Â ¶Ç 55kmÀÇ °Å¸®ÀÌ´Ù. ¾îÁ¦ ¾Æħ¿¡ ±×·¸°Ô °¡º±´ø ¸öÀÌ ¾îÁ¦ ¿ÀÈĺÎÅÍ Ãµ±Ù¸¸±ÙÀÌ´Ù. ÀÌ·² ¶§µµ ³ª¸¦ ¿òÁ÷ÀÌ´Â ÈûÀº ¸¶À½ÀÇ ±äÀåÀÌ´Ù. ÀÌ ±äÀåÀÌ Ç®¸®¸é ·Îº¿ÀÇ ³ª»ç°¡ Ç®¸®¸é ¼èºÙÀ̵éÀÌ ¹«³ÊÁöµíÀÌ ³ª´Â ¹«³ÊÁ® ³»¸®°í ¸» °ÍÀÌ´Ù. ´Ù¸®¿¡ ºÎ»óÀÌ ¿ÀÁö ¾Êµµ·Ï ÃÖ´ëÇÑ Á¶½ÉÇؼ­ 35km Á¤µµ ¿À´Ï Á¶¼Á ½ÃƼ Joseph City¶ó´Â Á¶¿ëÇÏ°í ÀÛÀº ¸¶À»ÀÌ ÀÖ´Ù. ¼­ºÎ¿µÈ­¿¡¼­ ÁÖÀΰøµéÀÌ ±×³É Áö³ªÄ¡´Â Àå¸éÀ¸·Î³ª ³ª¿À´Â ¸¶À»ÀÌ´Ù. ¿À´ÃÀº ³Ê¹« Èûµé°í ´Ù¸®±îÁö ½Ã¿øÄ¡°¡ ¾Ê´Ù. ¿À´Ã Ȧºê·è±îÁö °¡´Â °ÍÀº Æ÷±âÇعö¸®°í ¸»¾Ò´Ù. ³ª´Â ¼­ºÎ¿µÈ­ÀÇ ÁÖÀΰøÀÌ ¾Æ´Ï¹Ç·Î ¿©±â¼­ ¸Ó¹°±â·Î °áÁ¤Çß´Ù.

It's another 55 kilometers to the next destination, Holbrook. I was so light yesterday morning but since yesterday afternoon my body feels heavy and sluggish. Even at times like this, the power to move me is the tension of the mind. If I relax this tension, I will collapse as the iron sticks collapse when the robot's screw is loosened. I run about 35 kilometers as carefully as I can to prevent injuries to my legs, and there appears a quiet little town called Joseph City. It's a village where the main characters just pass by in Western movies. It's so hard today and my legs are not cool. So I gave up going all the way to Holbrook today. I decided to stay here because I'm not the main character of the Western movie.

 

ÀÌ µ¿³×¿¡¼­ ¸®¸¶¶ó´Â µ¿¹°À» óÀ½ º¸¾Ò´Âµ¥ ¸ð¾çÀº ¾ç°ú ¸» Áß°£Ã³·³ »ý°å°í ¼Òó·³ ÀÏÀ» ºÎ·Á¸Ô±âµµ ÇÏ°í °í±â¸¦ ¸Ô±âµµ ÇÑ´Ù°í ÇÑ´Ù. °øÀÛ»õ¸¦ ±â¸£´Â Áýµµ ÀÖ¾ú°í Ä¥¸éÁ¶µµ º¸ÀÌ°í, ´ßµµ ¸ø º¸´ø ¸ð¾çÀÇ ´ßµéÀ» ±â¸£´Â ÁýµéÀÌ ¿©±âÀú±â ÀÖ´Ù. ´ç³ª±Í³ª Á¶¶û¸»µéÀÌ º¸À̱⵵ Çß´Ù. µµ´ëü ¹«½¼ ¿ëµµ·Î Àú·± °¡ÃàÀ» ±â¸£´ÂÁö ±Ã±ÝÇß´Ù.

It¡¯s my first time to see an animal called Lima in this village. Its shape looks like a sheep and a horse, and it is said to work like a cow and we can eat its meat. There were houses where they raise peacocks, turkey, and chickens that had never been seen before. Some donkeys and ponies were seen. I wondered for what they were doing to raise such livestocks.

 

ÀÌ ¸¶À»¿¡´Â ¼÷¹Ú½Ã¼³Àº ¾ø°í Ä·ÇÎÄ« ÁÖÂ÷À常 À־ µé¾î°¡ ÅÙÆ®¸¦ Ä¡°Ú´Ù°í Çã¶ôÀ» ¹Þ°í ÁÖÀ§¸¦ µÑ·¯º¸´Ï ÀÛÀº â°í°¡ º¸ÀδÙ. ¿µÇÏÀÇ ³¯¾¾¿¡ ¹Ù¶÷µµ ºÎ´Âµ¥ ¹Û¿¡¼­ ÀÚ´À´Ï â°í¿¡¼­ ÀÚ´Â °ÍÀÌ ÈξÀ ³ªÀ» °Í °°¾Ò´Ù. ´Ù½Ã »ç¹«½Ç¿¡ µé¾î°¡¼­ â°í¿¡¼­ ÀÚµµ µÇ´À³Ä°í ºÎŹÀ» ÇÏ´Ï ¾ÆÁÖ¸Ó´Ï´Â ³²Æí¿¡°Ô ¹°¾îº¸¾Æ¾ßÇÑ´Ù°í ÇÏ´õ´Ï Á¶±Ý ÀÖ´Ù ±×·¸°Ô Ç϶ó°í ÇÑ´Ù. â°íÀÇ ¾Æ¹«·¸°Ô³ª ½×ÀÎ ÁüÀ» ¹Ð¾î³»°í ÀáÀÚ¸®°¡ µÉ ¸¸Å­ °ø°£À» ¸¶·ÃÇß´Ù. ¾ÆÁÖ¸Ó´Ï´Â ´Ù½Ã ÂѾƿͼ­ â°í¿¡ ½ºÆÝÁö ¸ÅÆ®¸®½º°¡ ÀÖÀ¸´Ï ±ò°í ÀÚ¶ó°í ÇÑ´Ù.

The village has no accommodation, only a parking lot for a camping car, so when I was given permission to enter and set up a tent, I looked around and saw a small warehouse. It was windy in subzero weather and I thought it would be much better to sleep in a warehouse than to sleep outside. When I went back to the office and asked if I could sleep in the warehouse, the woman said she should ask her husband, and she told me to do so a little later. I pushed the load off the warehouse and made room only for bed. The lady came in and said, "There's a sponge mattress in the warehouse, so you'll sleep on it."

 

â°í¶ó´Â °÷Àº ´çÀå ¾µ¸ð´Â ¾øÀ¸¸é¼­ ¹ö¸®±â´Â ¾Æ±î¿î ¾²·¹±âº¸´Ù´Â Á» ³ªÀº °ÍµéÀ» ½×¾ÆµÎ´Â °÷ÀÌ´Ù. ¾Æ±î¿ö¼­ ì°ÜµÎ¾úÁö¸¸ ¼¼¿ùÀÌ Á¶±Ý¸¸ È帣¸é ¾îµð¿¡ µÎ¾ú´ÂÁö Á¶Â÷ ÀØÈ÷°í °á±¹ ´ëºÎºÐÀº ¾²·¹±â·Î ¹ö·ÁÁö°í ¸¶´Â ¹°°ÇµéÀÌ´Ù. ³»°¡ Áö±Ý ±×·¸´Ù. °¡Á·µé°ú Ä£±¸µé¿¡°Ô ²À ÇÊ¿äÇÏÁö ¾ÊÀº, ±×·¸Áö¸¸ ³»°¡ ¿©±â¼­ ºÒÀÇÀÇ »ç°í¸¦ ´çÇÏ¸é ½½ÆÛÇÒ »ç¶÷µéÀº ÀÖ´Ù. ³ª¿Í ½Å¼¼°¡ ¶È °°Àº ¹°°Çµé°ú ÇÏ·í¹ã µÚ¼¯¿© ÀÜµé ¾ï¿ïÇÒ °Íµµ ¾ø´Â µíÇÏ´Ù.

A warehouse is a place where we pile up things we can't use it right away, not throwing away. We keep it for some day , but when years pass, we forget where we¡¯ve left it, and so most of it ended up being dumped in garbage. I am just so now. I don¡¯t seem to be necessary for my family and friends, but there are people who will be sad if I have a big accident here. It seems to be not unfair to sleep one night being mixed up with the piled things here, for they are on the same wavelength as I am.

â°í ¾È¿¡¼­ ¾îÁ¦ ¸¶ÄÏ¿¡¼­ »ê Ä¡Áî ¸¶Ä«·Î´Ï¿Í ÂüÄ¡ ĵ ±×¸®°í »ç°ú¸¦ Çϳª ¸ÔÀ¸¸ç ¹è¸¦ ä¿ü´Ù. ±×Àú ³»ÀÏ ¿òÁ÷ÀÏ ¼ö ÀÖÀ» ÈûÀ» ¾ò±â À§ÇÑ ÃʶóÇÑ ½Ä´ÜÀ̾ú´Ù. À½½Äµµ ³» ½Å¼¼¿¡ °É¸ÂÀ¸´Ï ±×°Íµµ ¾ï¿ïÇÒ °ÍÀÌ ¾ø´Ù. ´Ù¸¸ ³ª´Â ²Þ²Û´Ù. â°í¿¡¼­ ¾È¹æÀ¸·Î ¿Å°ÜÁö±â¸¦. ¡®ºûµÎ··±æ¡¯¸¦ ´Þ·Á°¡´Â ³» ¹ß°ÉÀ½Àº ¾È¹æÀ¸·Î ´Þ·Á°¡¼­ Á¦ À§Ä¡¸¦ Àâ°í ÇÊ¿äÇÑ ¿ªÇÒÀ» ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀÌ´Ù.

Inside the warehouse, I filled my stomach by eating cheese macaroni, tuna cans and an apple that I bought at the market yesterday. It was just a shabby diet to get the strength to move tomorrow. Food is my cup of tea, so there is nothing unfair with it. But I just dream of one thing : To be carried from the warehouse to the home living room. My steps running on the ¡°Bitdulunggil¡± or "lightpath-MK" are to run to the inner room of my house, get where I am and play the necessary role.

 

¾î¼¸é ´ëºÎºÐÀÇ »ç¶÷µéÀº º®À» ¸¸µé¾î ½º½º·Î¸¦ ÀÌ·± â°í ¾È¿¡ °¡µÖµÎ´ÂÁöµµ ¸ð¸¥´Ù. Áö±ÝÀº ³»°¡ ²À ÇÊ¿äÇÏÁö ¾ÊÀ¸´Ï ÀÌ ¾È¿¡¼­ ³»°¡ ÇÊ¿äÇÏ°Ô µÉ ¶§±îÁö ±â´Ù¸± °Å¾ß, Çϸ鼭. ±×·¯³ª â°í ¾È¿¡¼­ ±â´Ù¸®´Â µ¿¾È ¸ÕÁö°¡ ½×ÀÌ°í ³ìÀÌ ½½¾î ²À ÇÊ¿äÇÒ ¶§´Â Á¦ ±â´ÉÀ» Á¦´ë·Î ¹ßÈÖÇÏÁö ¸øÇÏ´Â °æ¿ì°¡ Çã´ÙÇÏ´Ù. Áö±Ý²¯ ³»°¡ â°í ¾È¿¡ µé¾î¿Í ÀÖ¾ú´ø ÀÌÀ¯´Â µÎ·Æ±â ¶§¹®ÀÌ´Ù. ½ÇÆÐÇÒÁöµµ ¸ð¸¥ ´Ù´Â µÎ·Á¿ò, »ç¶÷µéÀÌ Á¶·ÕÇÒ±îºÁ. ºÒ¾ÈÇÑ ¹Ì·¡¿¡ ´ëÇÑ µÎ·Á¿ò ¡¦

Perhaps most people make walls and keep themselves in these warehouses, thinking that they don't need me now, so I'll wait in here until they need me. However, there are many cases where dust accumulates and rusts while waiting in a warehouse and when it is necessary, it is not able to function properly. The reason why I've been in the warehouse all the time is because I'm afraid. For fear of failure, for fear of being ridiculed. For fear of a shaky uncertain future.......

 

ºñÁ¼°í Ç㸧ÇÏ°í ¿­±â¶ó°í´Â Çϳªµµ ¾ø´Â ³²ÀÇ Ã¢°í¿¡ ¿ÊÀ» ¿©·¯ Àå °ãÃÄ ÀÔ°í ´©¿ö¼­ Áö³ª¿Â »î°ú Áö³ª¿Â ¡®ºûµÎ··±æ¡¯À» µÇµ¹¾Æº»´Ù. ³» ¾ÈÀÇ ¿ÀÁö, ¸¶Ä¡ »ç¸·°úµµ °°Àº °÷¿¡ ÀÖ´Â µÎ·Á¿ò, ¿¬¾àÇÔ ±×¸®°í ¿ì¸ÅÇÔ±îÁö ±×´ë·Î ¹Þ¾ÆµéÀÌ´Â ³ª¿ÍÀÇ È­Çظ¦ ûÇغ»´Ù. ¹«¾ð°¡¸¦ ÀÌ·ç¾î¾ß º¸¶÷µÈ »îÀ̶õ °­¹Ú°ü³ä¸¸ ³» ¾È¿¡¼­ ²ôÁý¾î³»¾î ÀÌ Ã¢°íÀÇ Çѱ¸¼®¿¡ ó¹Ú¾Æ¹ö¸®¸é ³ª´Â ±×°Í¸¸À¸·Îµµ ¾µ¸ð ÀÖ´Â »ç¶÷ÀÌ µÉ °Í °°´Ù. ±×·± °­¹Ú°ü³äÀÌ ³ª¸¦ ¾Æ¹«°Íµµ ÇÒ ¼ö ¾ø´Â ¹«´ÉÇÑ Àΰ£À̶ó°í ¸ÅµµÇعö·È´Âµ¥ ³ª´Â ¹Ùº¸Ã³·³ ±×°É ¹Ï¾î¹ö·È´Ù.

Lying down in several layers of clothes in other¡¯s cramped, shabby and cold warehouse, I am looking back on the past life and the ¡°Bitdurunggil" or ¡±lightpath-MK¡°" that I have passed. I ask for reconciliation with me, who accept the fear of being in a desert-like place, the fragility and even the stupidity. If only the obsession that something should be achieved is brought out of me and thrown into the corner of this warehouse, I think that alone will make me a useful person. That obsession called me an incompetent person who could do nothing, and I trusted it like a fool.

 

¿À´Ã ¹ã ºñ¹Ù¶÷, ÃßÀ§¸¦ ¸·¾ÆÁÙ °ø°£¿¡¼­ ÇÏ·çÀÇ ÇǷθ¦ Ç® ¼ö ÀÖ´Â °Í¸¸À¸·Îµµ ¾ó¸¶³ª °¨»çÇÏ°í ÇູÇÑÁö ¸ð¸£°Ú´Ù. ÀÌ·± °÷Àº ¿ÀÈ÷·Á ²Þ²Ù±â¿¡ ¾Ë¸Â¾Æ¼­ ÁÁ´Ù. ¸¶À½ÀÌ °¡³­ÇØÁö´Ï ¹ß ´ê´Â °÷¸¶´Ù õ±¹ÀÌ´Ù. ¾ü±×Á¦ õ±¹ÀÇ ÀÔ±¸¿¡¼­ ¹¬¾úÀ¸´Ï ¿À´ÃÀº õ±¹¿¡ µµÂøÇÑ °ÍÀÌ´Ù. ¹°·Ð õ±¹ÀÇ ÀÔ±¸º¸´Ù´Â õ±¹ÀÌ ÈξÀ ³´´Ù´Â »ý°¢¿¡µµ º¯ÇÔÀÌ ¾ø´Ù. ³ª¸¦ ã¾Æ¼­ ±æÀ» ³ª¼­ ³ª¿ÍÀÇ È­Çظ¦ ¸ð»öÇÏ´Â ÀÌ °¡³­ÇÑ ½Ã°£¿¡ ³²ÀÇ Áý ¾îµÎ¿î â°í¿¡¼­µµ ÆòÈ­¿Í Æò¾ÈÀÌ ³ÑÄ£´Ù. ¶§·Ð â°í³ª ´Ù¶ô¹æ¿¡ ÀØÇôÁø º¸¹°ÀÌ Çѱ¸¼®¿¡ ó¹ÚÇô ¸ÕÁö¿¡ µ¤¿©Àֱ⵵ ÇÏ´Ù. ÀÌ ¿©ÇàÀ» ¹«»çÈ÷ ¸¶Ä¡°í ÀڽŰúÀÇ È­Çظ¦ ÀÌ·ç°í ³ª¸é ¸ÕÁö°¡ Àß ´Û¿© ¹Ý¦¹Ý¦ ºû³ª´Â º¸¼®ÀÌ µÉ °Í °°´Ù. ³»°¡!

I don't know how grateful and happy I am, for I can relieve my day's fatigue in a place that will prevent the rain and cold tonight. Such a place is rather better for dreaming. Being poor in heart, it is a heaven everywhere wherever my step touches. I stayed at the entrance to heaven the day before yesterday, so today I arrived at heaven. Of course, the idea that heaven is much better than the entrance to heaven remains unchanged. Peace and calmness are also abundant even in the dark warehouses of other person's house at this poor time of finding me on the road and seeking reconciliation with me on the road. Sometimes forgotten treasures are buried in a corner in a warehouse or attic and covered with dust. After finishing this trip safely and achieving reconciliation with myself, it will be likely to become a sparkling gem which will be washed clean. That¡¯ll be¡°I¡± !!!

 

 

by Kang Myong-ku

translated by Song In-yeup

 

±Û °­¸í±¸ ¿µ¿ª ¼ÛÀο±

 

 

±Û·Î¹úÀ¥Áø NEWSROH Ä®·³ ¡®°­¸í±¸ÀÇ ¸¶¶óÅæ¹®ÇС¯

 

http://newsroh.com/bbs/board.php?bo_table=gmg

 

 

´º½º·Î PC¹öÀü ·Î±×ÀÎ